Now, Forever
by Kayryn
Summary: JL, JI Laura's last night. Rated M to be on the safe side... T would most likely be enough.


Now, Forever (1/1) By: Kayryn  
  
Disclaimer: JJ's. Not mine. Never was, never will be. Yeah, who said life was fair. RATED: It was PG, but the couple didn't agree. It's PG13 or R. Dunno. I'm bad with these. Pairing: J/L/I Author's note: The most angst ridden story I've written in a while. I rarely dedicate my stories to anyone, but this one is for Kris. The CD worked and I got inspired. Hope you like!  
  
Now and Forever  
  
Still trying to even his breathing, Jack moved to lay beside her, careful not crush her under his weight. Looking at her, he was surprised to see her near tears.  
  
"Hey, you alright?" He asked, his voice was so tender and full of love, she couldn't help the few tears from escaping.  
  
"Laura, did I hurt you?" He wanted to know, her sadness scaring him.  
  
"No, you didn't," she finally said.  
  
"What is it then?"  
  
"I don't know," she lied, unwilling and unable to tell him the truth. How could she? She couldn't bear to see his face when he learned the truth. "I'll be okay."  
  
"Laura." he began as he gently brushed the few stubborn tendrils of her hair from her face.  
  
"Can you just hold me?"  
  
"Of course," Jack said and pulled Laura to him, her back resting against his chest as he enveloped her into his embrace.  
  
After a few minutes, he moved slightly so he could see her face. "Are you sure there's nothing I can do?"  
  
She turned around to face him, only to find out that words got stuck in her throat. Nodding, she pressed herself against him, taking comfort and strength from his presence.  
  
Jack held his wife, unable to understand what had caused her to be so distressed. Stroking her back with one hand, he kissed the top of her head, and wished he could take away whatever it was that was troubling her.  
  
Bringing his hand to her face, he drew invisible lines across her skin, marveling at her beauty. He then kissed her again, but this time his lips caressed her mouth, instead of her hair.  
  
Slowly, he felt her responding, and their kisses became more urgent as the heat between them escalated.  
  
"Love me now, forever," he whispered, repeating the words that had become a ritual for them since the time they were engaged.  
  
"You know I do," she said before kissing him again. As she did, Jack could taste fresh tears on her lips. Now determined to help her forget her pain, if even momentarily, Jack covered her breasts with his hands, the way he knew she liked, and rubbed his thumbs over her nipples. His mouth left hers and moved to her neck, first nibbling, then sucking hard, and finally biting gently.  
  
She moaned in pleasure and directed him lower.  
  
Giving and taking in equal measures, they loved each other for second time that night, one of them with a heart full of hope and the other with desperation.  
  
In the early hours of that morning, Irina was still awake, unwilling to rest, though Jack had fallen asleep soon after they'd made love. For hours now, Irina had lain in bed, watching him. She studied him in the faint moonlight, memorizing his face, though every line and small scar, every little detail there was, was already burned into her memory. Every time she closed her eyes now, she could see both Jack and Sydney, smiling and happy. The way she wanted to remember them.  
  
Finally, as the first rays of sun began to shine, Irina rose reluctantly, careful not to stir Jack from his sleep. Quietly she dressed and then looked around the room, silently bidding her goodbyes. Her heart ached, more than she had been prepared for, but the inevitability of what she had to do was strong in her mind. Trying to distance herself emotionally from what she was about to do, Irina walked out of the room, closing the door behind her.  
  
She made sure that the note she'd written earlier was with her. It would explain that she had gotten up early and had been unable to go back to sleep so she'd left for the school to take care of some paper work. The note would make sure Jack would not get worried about her absence. While writing it, Irina had laughed at herself. What use was it to write a note. She was about to destroy the lives of both her husband and daughter. But it had offered her some comfort to know that they could hold on to the illusion of Laura till the end.  
  
Walking the short distance from the master bedroom to Sydney's room, Irina braced herself. Opening the door quietly, she went to her daughter's side and reached down to stroke the little girl's hair.  
  
Knowing she couldn't afford to delay any longer, Irina leaned down to kiss the girl's head. "Mommy loves you, baby. Always remember that," she whispered before straightening up again.  
  
Looking at her daughter, she noticed the moisture on Sydney's hair and brought a hand to her face. Unnoticed tears were running down her cheeks, and Irina wiped them away frantically.  
  
Backing away, she took a long last look at the small sleeping figure before closing the door.  
  
Irina stood at the front door with her hand nearly touching the doorknob, but she was unable to reach for it and step out. Then, a minute later, against her best intentions, she found herself in their bedroom.  
  
Knowing he was fast asleep and wouldn't be easily awakened now that he was home, Irina bent over him and kissed him softly, her lips barely touching his. "Love me now, forever."  
  
She then rose and walked out, leaving behind the room, the home, and the life she'd lived for a decade.  
  
Twenty Years Later:  
  
As the first rays of sunlight began to shine, Irina woke up and, though reluctant, tried to get up from the bed without stirring Jack from his sleep. But Jack had become a lighter sleeper during the years since their marriage and he woke up.  
  
Seeing Irina halfway out of the bed, he reached out and pulled her back in. She struggled half-heartedly, but soon gave in to his advances.  
  
"Love me." The soft voice in which he spoke caressed her as much as any touch did.  
  
"Now, Forever. You know I do."  
  
The end 


End file.
